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Oh, Woe Is Me!

Oh, Woe Is Me!

It seems to me that everyone is stressed at the moment! Not me though. I’m not allowed. Nope! Not allowed to be stressed out. Not allowed to be in a bad mood. Not allowed to have a bad day. Who would hold everyone up if I fell apart – and would there be anyone there for me if I did? How many of you feel this way?

It’s concert time! Can’t talk to H because he has a lot on his mind. Kids skipping rehearsal, being sick, having another activity that is more important to them at the time. Of course the most important thing to H at the moment is the concert. He doesn’t have time for other activities. He is out of the house by 6:30 am and hardly ever home before 7:00 pm. Then there’s that hour commute going and coming. In between times he is studying  the scores, rewriting parts, rewriting parts, and again rewriting parts. It’s a small band and in a sense “everyone plays a solo”.  He can’t seem to make them understand that when you are sick, skipping, goofing off, or finding more important things to do during rehearsal time, there is a void. They are a great bunch of kids though and always seem to pull through for him at the last-minute. Concerts tonight! Then maybe State and it starts all over again! Wish them luck! 🙂

But…I’m there for him – sending out reminder emails about rehearsal time and concert schedule, and any other little detail that needs to be addressed – taking time out of my day to organize his. Maybe tomorrow we can have a decent conversation and I won’t have to tip-toe around as to not disturb or rattle his brain with unimportant (to him) conversations.

The end of the spring semester at Troy University is drawing near. Can’t talk to much to Andrew because he gets very stressed out at this time. Too much on his mind. Keeping up with schoolwork, rehearsals, last-minute lessons with important people. This all takes a lot of effort to balance. He’s a busy, busy, guy! I have to let it roll off my back when there are unanswered texts, unanswered  phone calls, and only quick conversations. (Do you see a pattern here?)

He did set aside a block of time for me on my way home from Atlanta on Monday. We had lunch, bought a few groceries and other items he needed, and actually had a conversation. It was fun. I enjoyed myself. Hope he did too. He sent me a text after I left and said “Thanks for lunch and all of the stuff and the money.” I answered with, “One day when I get old you will have to do that for me.” 🙂

So…is it almost my turn to be stressed? I finally hit my goal for likes on ‘Crossing The Line’ Facebook page and had to draw that name for the winner – Tina Anderson Newman! I sure hope Tina enjoys her prize.  Of course I was leaving the next morning to go out of town and it took me a week to get a list of names off Facebook so I could have a winner. There has to be an easier way!

I sold a couple of pillows on Etsy Friday morning and had to get those made and in the mail as soon as I returned home from Sydney’s christening. They were Christmas pillows and I sure wasn’t in the mood to sew Christmas items. Fa-la-la-la-la!

I also have a book I am trying to finish writing. ‘What Line’, the sequel. Does anyone even remember that? The only deadline there is the one I made for myself, but its important to me to get it done. I do have actual deadlines for my real paying job though. The Philadelphia room is piling up with work as I type.

Then there is all the social media for promoting I try to keep up with that I have fallen behind in the last week. Blogging, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc. This all takes time. Time that is scarce around here. Don’t give up on me. I’ll get in the rhythm again soon!

H has always told me the woman is the backbone of the family, the one who holds it all together, makes things better for all, and trudges on day after day taking care of problems without an utter of defiance. Hmmm? Who’s rule is that?

Someone's got to do it!

Someone’s got to do it!

So…I ask, ” Who’s going to be here for me if I fall apart?” They will – I’m sure of it. I have a lot of faith. I just don’t want to make them have to worry. There isn’t room for more than one worrier in the family. So glad those girls are all holding their own right now!

Anyone else out there stressed with a closed mouth?



About Elle Knowles

Elle Knowles lives in the Florida Panhandle with her husband and off-at-college-most-of-the-time son. She has four daughters, one son, and eleven beautiful grandchildren. 'Crossing the Line' is her first novel. The sequel 'What Line' is a work in progress. Recently published is Coffee-Drunk Or Blind - a nonfiction story of homesteading in the Alaska wilderness with her parents and four siblings, told through letters by her mother and remembered accounts from the family.

12 responses »

  1. Elle, you need Calgon to take you away!


  2. You said it all. You have to hold it together for everyone. Just remember you are setting an example for them all to follow. Hang in there. I’m sure we women of strong mind, body, and spirit will get our reward some day. We must just be able to handle stress better for them all. Women were put on this earth for something other than having babies, weren’t they??? There ya go…stress relievers! Or sounding boards???


  3. Four years with the band I seen all the work you do. Bry and I do appreciate all that you do for & with the dand.You are a great wife,mother & person. Thank you & God Bless You.


    • I keep trying to tell myself that! Thanks! And where am I today when I should be home working? Up to my neck in a strawberry fundraiser! Some think just because I work from home I don’t “really” work. Lol!


  4. Oh sweetness, it’s the story of women the length and breadth of the globe. Stressed with a closed mouth is a great way to put it. As long as you know you’re appreciated. And if you’re unclear on that, tell them all to fecking stop dead in their tracks, look at you, and say “I appreciate you.” Or else you lift a pan and wallop them over the noggins with it. Cus women are strong too. Lest they forget 😉


  5. One foot in front of the other Elle. That’s all anyone can every ask.



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