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We are a sorry lot – H and I. Can’t seem to get done what needs to be done anymore. We’ve been in a daze and we procrastinate – him more than me – which surprises me because I thought “Procrastination” was my middle name.

After arriving home a little before ten one night we realized H had not taken his medicine (you know how it is when you get old and your daily routine starts with meds to prolong your life) with his breakfast as he usually does.

Must be my fault because I’m the one who usually places it in front of him every morning even though – knock on wood – I so far have not gotten to the point of any pill-taking routine myself.

I can tell his mind is miles away when this was discovered because he took it in stride, chalking it up to a change in our morning routine and age of course. He could be mellowing out, but I don’t think that is the case.

We’ve done for a week things we don’t really want to do. It wasn’t part of the summer plan and not written into our equation. Of course our summer plan had already been drastically reduced by two weeks when the school start time had changed back in May.

Band camp was scheduled to start July 13th. It’s H’s last real “summer vacation” before he retires next year. After that it will be vacation every day. Procrastination was sort-of worked into the plan this summer until…

We knew we would have to face it sooner or later, and later as in next spring had been embedded into our minds for the last four years and not rush-rush to pack-up and change direction this late in the game.

So we pitched and we purged and combined almost twelve years of files and memories into three tidy plastic bins. Three “boxes” were piled in the back seat to sort through at a later date.

We dusted and arranged hard- worked-for superior plaques by date and event and shiny trophies were lined up on shelves and in cases like little soldiers marching on.

Music was filed in numbered order, their notes contained in the files only to be let loose with a melody when the season begins again.

The one-year-old cleaned uniforms were hung in the appropriate closets with hat boxes stacked neatly under each one. All are labeled and patiently waiting to be donned on proud, eager students for the first game of the season.

Color guard uniforms and accessories had been ordered earlier in the summer and will soon be ready to be shipped to their rightful owners.

Pictures were taken of plaques bearing Andrews name. Some good memories there and part of the school’s history. Who knows when we would lay our eyes on those again? There were quite a few with his name scattered amongst the others who  also excelled in the past eleven-plus years and only because he truly earned them while under the direction of his dad as the band director.

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It will be a new school and new routines for only one year, but what else can you do? You put on your blinders and push forward through the bumps and ruts in the road called life and do what is expected of you, hoping for the best. H is good at this. Me? Not so much.

Not having a say in the scheme of things, H moves through the change one day at a time putting it all in order and taking care of business. He’s been given a job and he will do it to the best of his ability and then some.

Hopefully, his legacy will live on and his students and band parents will continue to make him proud, even as he moves on to the next chapter in his life.

We wish them the best.



About Elle Knowles

Elle Knowles lives in the Florida Panhandle with her husband and off-at-college-most-of-the-time son. She has four daughters, one son, and eleven beautiful grandchildren. 'Crossing the Line' is her first novel. The sequel 'What Line' is a work in progress. Recently published is Coffee-Drunk Or Blind - a nonfiction story of homesteading in the Alaska wilderness with her parents and four siblings, told through letters by her mother and remembered accounts from the family.

13 responses »

  1. It’s such a cliché, “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger”.

    I absolutely despised hearing this said to me, time after time… No one knew the depth of despair. How could they? They did not wear our shoes.

    I look back upon that year. Truly a life-changer, and as difficult as that time was, there were embedded gifts to be discovered.

    One day, one moment, one challenge at a time. When the boat begins to fill with water and that fear ravages your heart and soul, reach out to a friend. There is no greater gift you can give yourself. There’s a reason why God plants these special people in our lives.

    Cry, scream, drive around the block. Eat a candy bar. Smile at a stranger. Hug yourself. Take a bubble bath.

    Don’t look back. Be present in the moment.

    It’s okay to roll your eyes and say, “Who is this woman?” I’m a lady who decided that some days, ‘just eat dirt’! Not you…the ‘day’ eats dirt and the fire from Hades scorches the world.

    Girl, you’re gonna make it. I don’t doubt it for a moment.


    Liked by 1 person

    • One step at a time is all we can take. And believe me I feel like kicking and screaming a lot these days. You would think I’m the one being transferred. It will all come out in the wash as my mother used to say! Thanks for stopping by. ~Elle

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Beautiful Elle and lovely to meet you and your family… Barbara

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reblogged this on Dream Big, Dream Often and commented:
    Meet Elle Knowles and Finding Myself Through Writing!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A wrapping up but a new beginning, even if the immediate prospect was not entirely desired – here’s wishing you many joys to look forward to.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This is very melancholy to say the least. It’s always that unforeseen curve that throws you for a loop. In my best Pollyanna propensity, maybe there’s something you just don’t see yet that will one, make more sense out of this, and two be a blessing in both your lives.

    One of my favorite little prayers..Let us give thanks for unseen blessings already on the way.

    I’m thinking of you. Susannah

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Wishing only to best for H and you! Change is not always what we want in life but change can show others what they had and lost! May H enjoy the next year and do all that he can to leave a legacy now at two schools, not one.

    Liked by 1 person


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